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Monday, November 22, 2004
Blogging in Bites

This Big.Fulfiling.Life thing is really good.

Right after my divorce I tried to fill the Big.Gaping.Hole where my heart once lived with the busy-ness of life. I soon realized that as my heart returned to its normal size, I didn't have time for the popcorn tasks I'd set for myself. I gradually let go of a few things - one bit at a time. Until I felt like I was balanced again.

I had enough time to enjoy my son, to get to work (relatively) on time, to write, to dream, and to take the odd sweet-smelling bath in the twilight that only single moms can enjoy, when the child has gone to bed, the house is silent (except for the automatic ice dispenser cracking out ice), and it's just you sweating in a too-hot bath.

Gradually life has picked up some momentum. I am getting more writing assignments, I'm moving, my bf is visiting for another four weeks... my life is crammed full again.

But this time it's not just useless popcorn filling... it's all rich and sweet and wonderful. Somedays I find myself smiling and I can't decide what I'm smiling about. Is it my son and his new haircut? Is it about the new thing I learned about the bf today? Is it the chocolates he brought me when he picked me up? Or the fact that he washed my car? Is it my renewed love of cooking from scratch?

I don't know, I do know that I'm busy and I love it. So I'm sorry I have to carve this blogging time out of the end of my work day, but I do. I just have such little time to blog... but on the plus side, I'm learning a lot about how much I love my Big.Fulfilling.Life.
  The Writing Mother
  posted at 4:58 PM
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