I do not watch that many shows on TV these days. It seems I'm always busy writing or sleeping. Or mothering. But the ones I do choose are the ones that make me cry. So at the moment I'm watching Greys Anatomy because it makes me bawl a lot.

(Except when I'm watching the storyline about Dr. McDreamy and his Wife and Meredith. That one pisses me off and I have a major hate-on for the Wife... and I'm usually partial to red heads.)

I am not sure why I consciously choose to watch shows that make me bawl. Sometimes it just feels good to involve myself in something external that makes me feel something extreme again. I used to feel in the extreme each and every day, but somewhere along the line I leveled out.

I'm not sure if that's good or bad. If it were good, why would I seek it again.

Sorry for the lack of bloggage, I have been very busy with writing. But I've finished my articles and this means that I have also started to read the new Diana Gabaldon book.... :0)

First, I must apologize for my lack of bloggage - I *ahem* forgot my password. It's as though my brain reached capacity and purged or something.

I read Kira's blog every day. (Did you know she got engaged?) Kira and I are in some weird sort of parallel universe where every other day there is something that fits EXACTLY with my life. It's like she is a fly on my wall. One of her sons is the same age as my son and very often they are doing the same things. For instance, now they are both learning to read.

I have to admit, I'm totally petrified of teaching my son to read the WRONG way. What if I choose the way he can't learn, what if I choose the wrong way that the school teaches, what if I totally screw him up?!?!

See, Kira has three boys and she homeschools, so she has had two to practice on. I desperately want Kira at my house to show me the way to teach my son to read.

M. has very little focus, he pings around from one task to another and the only time he sits still is when he's very tired or there's a particular TV show on that he wants to watch. In the mornings he watches cartoons while eating breakfast and I found Spiderman on - and even better, the OLD spiderman cartoon that I used to watch as a kid! - and he was frozen with spoon in mid-air and oatmeal dripping off of it.

'S'lookit mom!' he'd say. That's his version of 'look at this'. S'lookit. I have no idea where he gets it from. There are other words he says in his own way. Milk is "mlilk". Through is, of course, frew. And bath is "baff".

I worry about his lack of focus, he doesn't want to sit and write anything, he has little patience with colouring or drawing. He does like to play computer games though. I just worry that I've made my kid a new-generation style child that will grow up writing in internet script.

R U OK? CU L8R..

My husband suggests that he will develop in his own way, that he will find the focus when there is something he wants to focus on. So I'm going to keep trying to squeeze in the little bit of reading and writing I get in the few minute increments that we do now.

Currently our place to learn letters is in the 'baff'. We have soap crayons and my bathtub and shower walls are coverd in Ms. Little ones and big ones. He can also draw Os - which means he's only a step away from drawing MOM.

Yes, I'm suffering from a bit of jealousy.

My best friend has bought a new horse. Another friend has bought another horse. My cousin is pregnant and looks great.

I know that I need to count my blessings: I have a sweet and smart son, I have a wonderful husband and I am healthy and I enjoy my career. Things could be much worse, I know.

Excuse me, but the Church of Scientology can go to hell.

No normally I'm not against an entire religion, even one such as Islam that gets the worst of the religion bashing these days.

"Tom and Katie are likely to follow the church's "silent birth" guidelines during delivery, which means no music and no talking during the birth, which also means no screaming during the pains of labor."

The article goes on to say "newborns cannot be poked or prodded for medical tests or even spoken to for the first seven days of their lives"... um, OK. So you spend 9 months inside your mother, hearing the comforting murmur of her voice, you go through this bizarre and traumatic experience and then no one talks to you for seven day? HelloooOOO?

Pardon me for being a bit judgmental. But Tom Cruise has some serious control issues. I do not for a second believe that he can speak with any sort of credibility on childbirth. He is soley concerned on what HE believes is right as opposed to what his partner wants. But then again the C of S defines the religion as "knowing how to know". So OF COURSE he knows what is best for his pregnant girlfriend.

ARGH. I can't even voice how distasteful I find this.

I am this:

you are dodgerblue #1E90FF

Your dominant hues are cyan and blue. You like people and enjoy making friends. You're conservative and like to make sure things make sense before you step into them, especially in relationships. You are curious but respected for your opinions by people who you sometimes wouldn't even suspect. Your saturation level is high - you get into life and have a strong personality. Everyone you meet will either love you or hate you - either way, your goal is to get them to change the world with you. You are very hard working and don't have much patience for people without your initiative. Your outlook on life is very bright. You are sunny and optimistic about life and others find it very encouraging, but remember to tone it down if you sense irritation.

the spacefem.com html color quiz