While you are over on the sidelines whining because your son has to take turns with the ball... while you are berating your five year old for not remembering which net is his... while you arguing with the coach (aka: me) about which field we are on... while you are commenting about my son's inability to kick properly .... ("what, did he learn everything from his mom?")

Please remember:

I am taking the time out of my day to coach these children while almost 6 months pregnant and I think that they are ALL wonderful, cute and precious kids that deserve praise... yes, they deserve praise just because they run. Just because they try.

And YES I will continue to praise BOTH TEAMS for their efforts. It's called sportsmanship, buddy. Just because you show up to practice in track pants and I can barely squeeze into mine, doesn't mean that you are a superstar.

And yes, there are kids that are faster, kids that are quicker, kids that are bigger. But keep in mind that they are kids. The point of U6 (under six years old) Soccer is to make sure that they are having FUN.

So while you may sneer at my games, and you may think that me giving them "magic stickers" for their shoes to teach them how to kick properly is lame... let me remind you.

I'm the coach, asshole, so back off.

Oh, and while you are on the sidelines bitching... next time make sure you aren't bitching to my son's grandmother. Idiot.