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The Writing Mother

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Things You Think are Romantic, but SO Aren't. 1...
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Horrible Mother Syndrome Yes, this is me, I'm a...
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Monday, August 30, 2004

Sad News

The anorexic Chicken Fish has passed. I thought for a couple of days that he was just mellow, but now he's VERY mellow and laying at the bottom of the bowl. And not moving. Now, if I want a new fish, I have to fish my fish body out of the bowl and take him in to the store in a little Ziplock coffin and redeem him for a new fish. This time I want one with balls thankyouvermuch. I want agression, I want valour, and yes, I will be pushing all the little cups together to see which one is the toughest.

My luck, it will come home and die of a heart attack from overuse of anabolic steriods.


Did you know, Katie and I eat our cookies exactly the same way. There's a system.

1. check for cookie softness, no softness... must grumble
2. bite edge of cookie, not too deep in, just the crust.... must be a shallow and mostly horizontal bite.
3. same bites all around the outside of the cookie... remember, the shallower the better
4. When done, all you have is the inside of the cookie.. then you can eat big, deep, vertical bites in a circle until it is finished.
5. Last bite must always have a chunk in it... Macadamia nut, chocolate chip.... whatever, there must be a chunk in the last bite.....


There are very few things in life I have control of (note: my emotions are not one of those things) and eating has lived in the land of the uncontrolled for several years now. I was one of those teenagers that got sent to the fat doctor. I was the one my dad said had 'too much baby fat'. My first boyfriend put it beautifully when he said "you're not fat... it's just your thighs" (see... things that you think would be romantic, but SO aren't, below).

So I have this battle of eating and stressing about eating, and not eating, and stressing about not eating. But lately I'm out of control. It's the fault of ALL OF MY COWORKERS.

We, seriously, have the most food ever at our office. Chocolates, Tim Horton's donuts, cookies, you name it, it's here... and I cannot stop eating!! Just when I should be thinking about eating healthy (countdown is about 4.5 days until I need to venture into public in a bathing suit), I have the least resistance ever. Hell, I even stooped so low as to open the tub of fake icing and scoop out a spoonful .. just for the rush.

I should just spread it on my thighs to save it the trip through my digestive system.
  The Writing Mother
  posted at 6:51 AM

At 4:57 PM, Blogger Tiff said...

Sorry about your fish. :(


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