Rude People

I have identified my number one pet peeve. Rude People. This is a good Peeve because it encompasses so many different peeves. But right near the top are the Rude People with Bad Table Manners. I know several of theses individuals. I'm unsure how they have gotten through life without having pencils stuck in their eyes, because just listening to them eat makes me want to jab an HB in each socket.

There should be a basic manual for these people. With nice, easy to read chapters that they can.. ahem... digest easily.

Cud Chewing for Non-Cows
Slurpless Noodles
You CAN Drink Your Coffee Without Slurping It
How to Finish Your Food and THEN Your Sentance For Dummies
Finger Sucking: A Guide to Stopping That Before I Chop Your Fingers Off

There is just no excuse, really.